gibby: you wanna go to target!?
me: yeah! lets go soon
gibby: …are you clean?
me: um… yes?


i heard the funniest time travel joke tomorrow

(via faggotarian)


i hope u find someone that mindlessly plays with your hands and lightly strokes your legs and massages your back and plays with your hair and i hope that u feel like you’re home when u look at them

(via augustdaisies)


And I don’t think they’re getting to it in History of Magic. “If you think Voldemort’s evil…this fuckin’ guy.” - Kumail Nanjiani (x)

(via mulaneysbutt)


oh nooooooo


oh nooooooo

(via coldstoneslover)


i dont think my friends understand. when i say my room is messy i dont mean “cute” messy where i have a jacket hanging here and there i mean messy as in fuckin trash island where garbage citizens hold elections over who will become the next trash overlord it’s fuckin gross

(via tay-schlling)


clock: 3am

me: image

(via patronsaintofhomo)


Asexuals don’t fuck around.

(via my-senpai-aradia)


I think my selfie problem is getting out of hand..

(via thesunburstscloudsbreak)


If ever you feel stupid, remember that one time my twin brother forgot my birthday.

(via thesunburstscloudsbreak)

all things funny, weird, and POPCORN. I like popcorn, cheesecake, fish, french, John Mulaney, SA Spurs, Tom Hiddleston, Dexter, Breaking Bad, Community, pretty Little liars, Grey's anatomy, glee, modern family, new girl, shameless, gossip girl, family guy, american dad, robot chicked, harry potter, mortal kombat, dragon ball-z, high fashion, how i met your mother, sewing, being mean, ian harding, tom hiddleston, SUITS, gabriel macht, patrick j adams, SNL, tina fey, 30 rock, amy poehler, parks and rec, office, switched at birth, hoarders, anything and everything. CONAN, NO ONIONS, NO MAYO, hold the spicy stuff. hand me the napkins. disney pixar. indie movies. i like ALL music and yes i mean country and rap and metal too :D

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